My Crash Course in Crypto (aka: The Stress Test I Didn’t Sign Up For)

Let me just start by saying this: I consider myself pretty tech-savvy. I build websites, run multiple businesses, deal with automations, payment processors, you name it. But crypto? That’s a whole different beast. And I’m convinced nobody really talks about how confusing it actually is when you’re trying to use it for something real — not just “buy and hold,” but when you actually need it to pay vendors and source products for your customers.

I spent hours upon hours trying to figure this out. Not exaggerating. And just when I thought I finally had it under control… something else popped up and knocked me back to square one.

Blockchains — WHY didn’t anyone tell me there were different ones?

So picture this: me, proudly thinking I finally get it.

I go to send a payment.

I put in the amount.

Hit send.

And then — my heart just hit the floor.

Turns out I was trying to send on the wrong blockchain.

Did I know there were different blockchains? Absolutely not.

Did I understand why that matters? Also no.

All I knew was: I thought my money was gone.

Poof. Vanished.

Thank goodness the transaction got blocked, because unlike banks… crypto does not have a “whoops, my bad” button. Once you send it? That’s it. You mess up the address and you can kiss that money goodbye. Forever. Nobody warned me how permanent this stuff is.

The fees. Oh my gosh, the fees.

Why does NO ONE talk about the fees?

The influencers? Silent.

The platforms? Vague.

The tutorials? Absolutely useless.

Here I am trying to buy crypto to pay vendors — you know, doing this for business — and I kept having to increase my transfer amount because every move you make has a fee attached. Buying it? Fee. Sending it? Fee. Swapping networks? Fee. Breathing? Probably a fee.

And don’t even get me started on watching the value drop seconds after you buy it. Truly love that for me.

A learning curve that feels like a brick wall

I’m not saying I’m old, but I’m also not 20 anymore. And I’ll admit… some things are getting harder to understand the older I get. But crypto? That learning curve is more like a learning mountain. A very tall, very icy one.

The good news (I hope?) is that maybe — maybe — this gets easier the more I do it. That’s the goal, at least. I’ll get my vendors paid, I’ll get my customers better pricing, and I’ll figure out how not to have a mini heart attack every time I hit the “send” button.

But wow.

Good grief.

This process almost did me in.

Cheers to the learning curve… and hopefully leveling up soon. 🥂